March 2011
1 post
These past few months have been hard :\
Holy shit I haven’t updated shit since christmas ._.
But 2011 has been a really fun and great year so far :D But it’s also been really hard :\
I’m working about 30 hours a week total now (coaching and tillys) and my shifts at tillys are at 6am or 7am because I have coaching at night. Sooo the melanie you guys knew that never gets up that early is no more T_T
Sleeping has been...
December 2010
6 posts
Valerie and I were talking about how things are...
Everyone is home for christmas right now/will be soon :D
Valerie is taking her driver’s test on the 30th (and I’ve been trying to give her driving practice time in my car but my nerves get shot to hell watching XD)
I got a job (although its just seasonal, its experience, more money than before, and they might rehire me again in the future :D)
The only last burdens I have to deal...
insomnia :[
In a sense, my insomnia has gotten better, but also worse lately.
When I don’t have nug to smoke, I usually can’t go to sleep until sunrise…
Last night for instance, I took 5 melatonin within two hours (you’re only supposed to take a maximum of 2 for every 4 hours) and I STILL couldn’t even get remotely close to sleep until 530am to 6am.
The melatonin didn’t...
pause button
:\
I’ve been kind of mer lately. And derp too.
I think its cuz my health is starting to crash again. I got a headache for the first time in two weeks. My eyes are fucking nasty. And my cough is back. But I’ve even been taking vitamins lately and working out a little :[
But, really, for my birthday, I really just want everyone (myself included) to just get really fucked up (wherever...
November 2010
5 posts
Seasonal Depression
BAH.
I can feel it >:[ I feel really sluggish and depressed. Usually for no reason, or I’ll think up ridiculous things in my head. >:\
I’m gonna still try to find a job somewhere other than the Wellness place. It’s based solely on commission and I don’t wanna have a job that unstable :\
School is effing me up the butt. I wish I wasn’t here for some reason. I...
Kayla: "Its not pink eye until it starts crusting...
GUESS WHAT HAPPENED THIS MORNING -__- DAMNNN ITTTTTT
My first time ever having full blown Pink Eye and I have an interview in Newport in 2 hours as a “Wellness Coach” -_________________-
I wanna put a patch over it and make up a lie about me getting hit in the eye with a lacrosse ball or something XD Cuz I know my eye looks nasty -_-
Anywayssssss I’m gonna get ready :] I dont...
Communication
That’s why you cant have a daughter or a son. Because you can’t communicate with us.
Did you know that I was never actually told that my mom got a divorce from my ex-step dad? One day while driving me to school (I can remember the exact spot he told me) he said that him and my mom were having trouble and we may not see him for awhile, but things would work out. Sometimes we...
I don’t know why I find it so hard to ask my mom if she can give me 20 dollars so I can go to the doctor’s to find out if I had a seizure or not on Halloween.
I think it’s because I know she’ll say no.
Migraines
So, last night on Halloween I got a migraine unlike anything I’ve ever experienced in yearsss. And seeing my friends see me in such suffering, made me realize that most people don’t realize what hell people with migraines go thru. I’ve been getting migraines for about a year, much worse ones about 4 months ago than now. Now I only get a migraine every two or three weeks.
Migraines can basically...
October 2010
18 posts
If Moose dies, this'll be the second of my dad's...
I remember exactly where I was when I heard about the first dog dying. I remember how I hung up the phone and started sobbing in the middle of the parking lot. It was one of the few times my mom comforted me while I cried.
Don’t tell me it’s just an animal. Just a dog. Of course I’m destroyed at the thought that I’ll never be able to return to my dad’s house and have...
I hate people who are so insecure, they becomes...
I hate it when they become so insecure that if the attention was diverted from them for more than a second, they become irritable, horrified at the thought that someone else is more deserving of the spotlight than them.
I hate it when insecure people cannot be original with their own thoughts and instead have to steal the ideas and thoughts of others, claiming that it was their own all along....
valerie
road
twisty, ups and downs, sometimes straight/rest stop, very travelled on, faded lines, two lane road
happy while walking
fork in the road
one to power plant, the other to a blue, bright sky
confident in choice, choose the clouds
trees
child drawing of trees, a lot of trees
pleasant feeling, feels nice being close to things that are similar and natural
house
planted trees and bushes,...
for every action, there is a reaction: Catalina:... →
asstoe:
I’m thinking about going to Catalina, this Halloween weekend. It’s probably gonna be loads of fun, since 1) I’m going with people I’ve gotten close to over the past few weeks and 2) it’s Catalina.
But here’s the catch: It’s with Intervarsity, a Christian fellowship.
I feel really bad if I go…
hey hey hey I wasn’t the only one who puked XD cuz i know for sure the ones with...
ppaaaaatricckkkkkkkkkkk
pat-mut:
biteemeoww:
:P
Was I supposed to reblog this :D?
no the other oneee XD
We will always be here for you.
headaches headaches headaches
blah blah blah blah blahblahblahablahfblahablashdfasdfljasdfjlkj
Sunday
So, nicole, val and I sat in front of val’s house for 2 and a half hours yesterday hahahha Until 330am XD Class this morning was very remincising of AP Stats when Kayla, Huy, and I would all just sleep in the back corner of the classroom XD
Seeing majority of the sassy really rejuvenated me :] Us lingering at the table after finishing eating, then lingering in the parking lot, then...
I have TWO interviews now :D
SO TILLYS CALLED ME BACK HEHEHEHEHEHE
I had called them a few days ago but they said they weren’t hiring until november so I kinda gave up on them BUT THEY CALLED ME JUST NOW ASKING IF I WANTED TO HAVE A QUICK INTERVIEW WITH THEM HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE
I have an interview tomorrow then another the next day :D
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
I think...
Herp a derp update
Interview on thursday with Pier 1 Imports :D
We have a couple more places to look at apartment-wise, we thought we found the place but nicole ended up deciding she didn’t want to move out and we’re figuring out money still…
I volunteered at the clinic one night with valerie and we just sat around labeling bottles and rolling joints for the people hahahha it was really...
September 2010
66 posts
Pier1Imports called me back today!!!!!! :D
Of course I stupidly asked the guy how he was twice in a row because I had just woken up XD
I haven't been this sad in years.
First my dad’s wedding and now this.
I feel like my heart is breaking.
I was so happy too. I felt such a bright future approaching.
And now, I feel like I’m back in the shadows again, surrounded by my darkest demons.
Why am I never allowed to be happy?
What did I do that was so wrong?
1 tag
Okay, I've got a bit of a perdicatment with my job...
In order to move out, I need about $400 every month for rent/bills and about another $200-$300 for gas/food/personal every month. So I need to make at LEAST $600 a month.
If I get a job at minimum wage, I would need to work AT LEAST 20 hours a week and make about $700 a month.
If I get the CostCo job, I’ll be making around $11 dollars an hour. And since the shifts are 6 hrs I’d work...
Just called my dad
He said everything was perfect and they didn’t mind I couldn’t make it. They’re going to breakfast now…. He said it was a quick 15 minute thing at the courthouse and he was just being the jolly person he is.
I feel like 5% right now.
And I only feel like that 5% at all because my dad kept me on the phone so long telling me that it was okay and that if I didn’t stop...
It's 8:55 am right now
I literally woke up at 8:47am.
My dad’s wedding was at 8:30 am in anaheim.
I don’t know what happened, either I turned my alarm off in my sleep and don’t remember or it just didn’t fucking go off. I bet I turned it off and don’t remember again, cuz I couldn’t fall asleep til 3 last night.
I’m so angry/sad right now.
ALL i wanted this week was to go to...
P.S.
MY DAD IS GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW.
I’M GOING TO TAKE SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MANY PICTURES.
I hope I don’t cry ._.
Even though I’m BEYOND excited to move out, I’ve gotta say I’m kinda stressin.
I only eat one, maybe two meals a day because my appetite has just kinda disappeared…. My hair has started to slowly fall out again…. Now that I’ve got no money for weed, I haven’t been sleeping well again… :[ I’ve got only $5.70 on my card. Half a tank of gas
...
THE MOVING SITUATION
first off… hehhe lolz “situation” :D
We WANT an apartment in Irvine, but the fact is that shit is like 300 dollars cheaper and an extra 200 sq/ft if we go to tustin or santa ana -_-
We so far have 3 people down to move in (me, val and cory salazar) Nicole is unsure, she just needs to figure out her money situation. BUT we have 2 other people that are like “eeehhhhh maybe...
Watchpotterarchy:
Deathly Hallows Trailer September 22, 2010
oh baby.
1 tag
My FAVORITE apartment so far. →
